Category: Uncategorized

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

Well.. What do you say about a movie, which you are aware is already a worldwide blockbuster.. Let me tell you. Lacks soul totally.

A big letdown, yet maybe a big hit among children because of the fantastic CGI work. Yes it is a seat of the edge thriller, if you still enjoy being scared by loud dinosaur roars and excellent sound design.

Nothing much to say about the actors here, whether Chris Pratt or anyone else.. wonder what is Jeff Goldblum doing here apart from announcing another sequel..

The story is paper thin.. Owen and Claire are out to save the dinosaurs from extinction due to a volcanic eruption, and no wonder they are tricked into going there by a villain who intends to sell the dinosaurs worldwide as “trainable” war soldiers. Rest is boom and bam ! #JurassicWorld #FallenKingdom

Good for a family weekend where you child will be staring the screen and you will be short of popcorn throughout the movie..

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Happy Valentine’s Day! Just another love story.

 

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

Just Another Love Story

 by:   Rajesh J. Advani 

It was a lovely December morning in the hottest city in the world. All right, so that was a little unfair. Chennai is not the hottest city in the world. But it certainly is the city with the most uncomfortable weather among the cities that I have lived in. And I’ve been around. But I digress.

I was in the company bus on my way to work, as usual trying to catch up with my sleep. On this particular day, a girl got on the bus, came to my seat and sat down. “Good Morning,” she said. I looked back at her through half closed eyes, replied “Good Night,” and then proceeded to return to my half hour nap before the bus reached the office. Unfortunately, I was woken up by a punch in the arm.

“Wake up, bozo!” She was looking at me with a big smile on her face. “I’m not sitting next to you to listen to you snore.”

Half-heartedly, I opened my eyes and turned to her. “What’s up?” I asked.

Preeti Mehra was tall, good-looking and slightly tomboyish. She was also my best buddy. “Come on,” she said. “Don’t look so disappointed. You’d rather sleep than talk to me?”

“I talk to you everyday, Preeti.”

“You also sleep everyday.”

“It’s not enough.”

“So you’ve had enough of talking to me, eh?”

You can’t argue with a statement like that, so I had to give up. I grinned and said, “OK, sweetheart. What’s on your mind?”

“I wanted to tell you what happened yesterday. Can you guess?”

“Anurag called you last night.”

“How did you know?” She was stunned.

“Oh, he asked me for your number yesterday.”

“And you gave it to him?”

“What else could I do? And stop complaining. You’ve been drooling over him for weeks now. He must have thought he had a chance.”

Preeti was the kind of girl who would openly ogle at every other guy she saw. And yet, she would not respond to any advances of a romantic nature. She’d happily join a group of boys to go to a cricket match, but if asked out to a movie, dinner, or even coffee, she’d never say yes. She defined ‘Hard-To-Get’.

“You like putting me in these situations, don’t you?” she said.

“No. That’s not true. I love putting you in these situations!”

That invited another punch in the arm.

I had known Preeti for a year. We’d tell each other about our joys and our sorrows, our victories and our defeats. I’d tell her about all my crushes and she’d scold me for being silly. She’d drag me to classical music concerts and I’d add them to the list of things she ‘owed me’ for.

And though I never let it show, I must say that she punched pretty hard.

~*~It was 12:00 am and my phone was ringing. “Hello,” I said, as I picked it up.

“Happy Birthday!” It was she.

“You’re supposed to throw me a surprise party, sweetheart. Not just call to say

Happy Birthday.”

“Well then open your door, dumbo!”

So I did and found her, cell-phone in hand, at my doorstep — with what seemed like half the population of my company. My roommates were supposed to be working late that night. Now I knew why.

I blew a lot of candles (seemed like much more than 25), cut my cake, got kicked in the behind, and got painted with the cake’s icing. If Preeti had had her way, she’d probably have preferred to use a paintbrush and a can of paint. But I bribed her with a copy of the book ”Lord of the Rings”. She’d borrowed it from me three times already. I thought it was about time I gave her a copy for herself.

We chatted for an hour after everyone had gone. “I think it’s time I left,” she said finally, trying to stifle a yawn. I nodded. I dropped her home in my roommate’s car. As she was getting out of the car, I stopped her.

“Hey, Preeti.”

“What?”

“Thanks.”

“Hey, don’t get senti on me now!” she smiled. “Are you trying to worm out of that gift you promised me?”

“You know, it’s interesting how I’m getting you a gift on my birthday.”

“That’s just because you’re stupid,” she grinned. “And you better get me that book, or I won’t return your copy.”

“Hey, that copy was a gift to me from my dear friend Preeti Mehra. I can’t let you keep that.”

She wasn’t falling for that. “Your dear friend? And what about me? Am I not dear to you?”

“Very smart. That won’t work with me. I’m not one of your Love Crazy suitors. Why do you need the book anyway? You’ve read it umpteen times already.”

“That is besides the point. You are getting me the book. We both know that.” She smiled that wide confident smile of hers. “Good night.” And she got out of the car.

I sat there for some time, just thinking. Our conversations were always like this – a little joking, a little teasing and a lot of demanding. But somehow, I felt that something had changed since the moment she had turned up at my door that night. I was still in my reverie when a paper ball landed on the windshield. I craned my neck out of the window and looked up. She was standing in her balcony.

“What are you still doing there?” she whispered loudly.

“Waiting for you to start a paper-ball fight,” I whispered back.

“We can do that tomorrow. Go home now. It’s way past your bedtime!”

“Ok, mommy,” I grinned back. “I’m going home now!”

~*~I’m an extravagant gift-giver, and it is definitely going to be my downfall some day. I made her wait for it, but finally bought her the book. That, and half-a-dozen other omnibus collections of various authors, including a copy each of `The Complete Works of Shakespeare’ and `The Complete Short Stories of Charles Dickens’. All I got for it was an “I told you so.”

I started spending a lot of time at her place after that. Mostly because I wanted to read all those books, and she wouldn’t lend them to me.

“I’m not as stupid as you, ape-man. I’m not falling into the same trap I laid for you. Plus, you dog-ear your books. You’re not doing that to these masterpieces. So if you want to read them, you read them here. And if you want to mark your place, use a bookmark.”

So that’s what I did. She’d even make me wash my hands before I touched the books. It was as if they were sacred.

“Need I remind you that it was me that bought you the books in the first place? For my birthday!”

“So? They’re mine now.”

“Well, then. I’ve been meaning to ask you this for a long time. Where exactly is my birthday gift?”

“It was in your tummy at one point of time. It’s probably been washed into the sea by now.”

“Huh?”

“Remember the cake I baked you on your birthday?”

“You what? You can’t bake cakes!” That was a mistake. She looked hurt. “You baked me a cake?” She didn’t say a word. She just shrugged.

I was stunned. “But you never told me.”

“You didn’t ask.” That was typical of her.

“It was fantastic! And you wasted most of the icing on me!”

“The cake was for you, dumbo.”

“How long did it take you to make the whole thing?” It had been a two-layered vanilla-chocolate cake with three flavors of very creamy icing. She had done all that!

“Well, the chocolate cake took an hour and fifteen minutes, and so did the vanilla. Then cutting them up and putting them together took another 15 minutes. Each flavor of icing took 20 minutes for preparation, and then putting it on the cake took another half hour. Cleaning up the mess took an hour.”

She seldom claimed the credit for anything, but once she started bragging, there was no stopping her. However, I wasn’t thinking about that right then.

“You spent over five hours on that cake?”

“A little over four hours preparing it, and an hour cleaning up. Yes.”

I was speechless. I didn’t know how to react. She hated cooking.

“I forgot to mention,” she continued, “the hours I spent the week before that, practicing. Even the birds wouldn’t touch the first three cakes!”

I couldn’t help but ask. “Why?”

“Because the first one got burnt, the second one was only half cooked, and in the third one, I forgot to add sugar.”

It was just like her, to try to divert the conversation. “I mean why did you spend so much time on baking me a cake?”

She looked at me like I’d asked her why the sun rises in the east. “For your birthday, stupid. Of course, I also wanted to beat every gift you’ve ever got me. Try beating this one.” She was grinning like she’d won the world championship.

As far as I was concerned, she had. I’d never spent a week making her anything. I’d never even spent an hour making her anything. Getting her a gift normally involved me taking her to the store, letting her choose and use my credit card. Suddenly, I felt cheap. “Thanks,” was the only thing I could say.

”Thanks a lot.”

“Hey. Are you getting senti on me again?”

I was.

~*~I was still mulling over my feelings for Preeti the next day at work when my boss asked to speak to me.

I went over to his cabin and he started with the usual greetings, asking how work was going and whether I was comfortable. He then told me that the company wanted to send me to New York for a couple of years. Normally, this wouldn’t have made much of a difference to me. I could work anywhere and didn’t have too much love for visiting places foreign. But right then, the first thought that came to me was that I’d be away from Preeti for two whole years.

Twenty-four hours before, I’d have been disappointed to lose her company. But right then, I was devastated. That was when I knew I was in love with her. I’d had crushes before. Lots of them. But this was different.

“Do you have any problem in going?” my boss asked, since I hadn’t responded.

“Not really,” I replied. What else could I say? That I was in love, and couldn’t bear the separation?

“When do I have to leave?”

I had a month.

~*~“Wow! New York! Great! I’ve heard it’s a fantastic city! Did you know it snows there in winter?” Preeti was obviously very excited about my going. She didn’t seem to share my disappointment on what I now saw as ‘separation’.

I had not decided then if I was going to tell her how I felt. We’d known each other for a little over a year, and we were very close, but beyond some mild flirting, the relationship had never got even close to romantic. That was, of course, until I found out she had spent a week baking me a cake. It’s funny how small things seem to make such a big difference.

“What happened?” she asked. “You don’t seem very happy.”

“Oh,” I replied, “it’s just that it’s so sudden, that’s all. And you know I was never all that interested in going to America.”

“What an idiot. Go see the place. I’ve heard the women there are amazingly beautiful.” She had a sly smile on her face. I wanted to tell her I didn’t care if I laid my eyes on another woman again, if she wasn’t with me. But I didn’t.

I realized that I only had another month with her. She’d rejected every guy who’d asked her out ever since I’d known her. I didn’t want the same to happen to me, and I didn’t want to make it awkward between us. I didn’t want to risk that month. I wanted it to be the best time I had ever spent with her. After I came back from the US, I might not even get to meet her again. Two years was a long time.

We ate out almost every night. We visited some of the best restaurants in the city. She also helped me shop for warm clothes, formalwear, shoes, toothpaste and a million things I’d never have thought of on my own.

“You need to buy a nail-cutter.” My roommates and I shared one.

“I’ve prepared a list of must-have medicines that you should carry.”

“Your iron won’t work in the US. No point buying one here as you need one that works at a hundred and ten volts and has flat pins. You can buy one at a K-Mart or Wal-Mart as soon as you get there.”

“You need at least two pairs of formal shoes and at least ten pairs of dark socks. The East Coast has a formal dress code. And you won’t do your laundry more than once a week or two.”

“How many ties do you have? And which trousers do your blazers go with?”

“Better get a haircut before you leave from here. Knowing you, you’ll postpone the first haircut for too long.”

She’d call me up at one in the morning to tell me to add ‘one more item’ to my list.

And with every passing day, I was falling more deeply in love with her.

The month swept by quickly. The day I was supposed to leave, I asked her to come with me to the airport. “Of course, dumbo. You think I’d let you go just like that, or what?”

After packing my bags for me and checking the lists for the hundredth time, she finally pronounced me “Good to go.”

We reached the airport four hours early to beat the rush, because it was an international flight. She got a visitor’s pass to sit in the waiting area while I went ahead and checked-in my bags. Preeti had got a spring balance from somewhere and so we knew my bags were well within the weight limit. I finished the formalities and came to sit with her. We had only a few hours before I had to go for my security-check. We decided to get something to eat at the food court. And all the time, the one thing that was going through my head was that, after this, I wouldn’t see her for at least another two years.

“Hey, Champ. Why so glum?” She saved ‘Champ’ for special days. Normally, it was just ‘dumbo’, ‘bozo’, ‘ape-man’, ‘matchstick man’, ‘weirdo’, or if she was very irritated with me, ‘nutcase’.

“I don’t want to go,” I said.

“I don’t want you to go either.”

“No, you don’t understand.” I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “I can’t stand the thought of living without you by my side.”

She stared at me. There was a strange look in her eyes. I couldn’t read it.

“I am madly in love with you, Preeti.”

At this, a sound escaped her lips that sounded like a cross between a sob and a laugh. “Well, dumbo, you’ve picked an absolutely fabulous time to tell me about it!”

A tear escaped her eyes. It was all I could do to stop myself from wiping it off her cheeks.

“How long have you felt this way?” She seemed amused, though she was definitely crying. I didn’t know what to make of it.

“From the day I found out you had baked me a cake.”

She laughed. “That’s all it took? Well, bozo, I guess a way to a man’s heart is

certainly through his stomach! Hold it. A month? You waited a month? You were the one who kept saying that if you really liked a girl you wouldn’t waste a day in telling her!” She was smiling widely now. It looked funny, with her eyes all wet.

“Well, I was confused. How did I know how you’d react? In fact, I still don’t understand your reaction. I thought it would change things between us. You’ve rejected every guy who ever proposed to you!”

“That’s because I’m in love with you, you overgrown idiot!”

“What?” Somehow, I’d never expected her to say that. She was in love with me? “How long have you been in love with me?”

“Ever since the day you offered to carry my suitcase for me.”

“But that was the first day I met you!”

“I guess I was always a sucker for chivalry.”

“All this time you’ve been in love with me and you never said anything! Then you go and complain that I waited a month!”

“You guys are so bad at reading a girl’s mind.”

“You women are so good at keeping your thoughts a secret! Even Einstein couldn’t figure you out.”

“Einstein was a nerd. Casanova, on the other hand, understood us very well.”

“I love you.”

“I know.”

That moment, my dear friends, was magic. I looked into her eyes and took her hands in mine. Physical contact for us had been limited, until then, to a punch in the arm, a slap on the back of the head, or giving each other a ‘high five’.

“You realize, don’t you,” she said, “that this is our first date?” Leave it to her to notice the little things.

“I really don’t want to go.” I’d always maintained that love is a bucketful of emotions. I wasn’t exactly delighted to be proved right.

“Don’t worry. I’m coming there in a couple of months.”

“How? On a dependent visa?”

She laughed. “For that, I’ll have to wait, won’t I? I’ve got a project in New Jersey.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. “What? When did that happen? You never even told me!”

“Well, I wasn’t sure you’d propose before you left. And I couldn’t exactly sacrifice you to those New York women, could I? I had to watch out for myself. So I went on a project-hunting spree. There is an opportunity coming up for a project in about two months. Someone is coming back to India, so I’ll be taking his place. They want me there for a little less than two years.” She was beaming. “I realized I had struck gold!”

“And if I’d not told you how I felt? When were you planning on telling me about it?”

“Around a month before I reached there. I had to make it look natural. Or you’d think I was desperate.”

“Well, you are desperate!” This was incredible. All I’d done in the past month had been to mope around, listen to sad songs and write her letters that I never intended her to read. “You’ve been scheming all this while! How come you didn’t lay a trap for me a year ago?”

“I tried giving you hints, dumbo, but you just wouldn’t pay attention!” She was laughing. “You’re the only guy I ever spent any time with. Wasn’t that a big enough hint?”

That was true. She would happily join a group of boys to go to a cricket match, but I now realized, only if I was one of them.

“What if I had rejected you?” I was extremely flattered that she’d been crazy about me for a year. My ego was swelling.

“You must be kidding!” she was clearly amused. “I get proposed to every few days. You are the one who’s been rejected more times in the last year than I can count on two pairs of hands!”

She really knew how to burst my bubble.

“Hey,” she said softly, “don’t look so dejected. I said ‘Yes’, didn’t I?”

I grinned. “Yes, you did. And you’ve made me a very happy man. But you know what would make me even happier?”

“What?”

“If you learn to cook as good as you bake cakes.”

So she punched me in the arm again.

The End Beginning

Aapla Manus – Review

प्रत्येक घरात डिटेक्टिव नोवेल कथा लिहिलेली असते,

तुमची डिटेक्टिव नोवेल कथा फक्त प्रकाशित झाली..

The powerhouse performer #NanaPatekar is back with none other than #SatishRajwade, Marathi cinemas blue eyed boy-director whose last movie “Ti Sadhya Kai Karte” made everyone nostalgic.

But this is a never before seen thriller and if you see the climax, you may not even categorise it as a thriller but as a social-thriller message movie though it will keep you at the edge of the seat with its twists and turns.

Nana is in a dual role, as the elderly widower Aaba staying with his son Rahul and daughter-in-law Bhakti, and also as the tough as nails crime branch officer Maruti Nagargoje who is investigating whether Aaba’s fall from his home and the resultant coma is the outcome of an attempted suicide or attempted murder.

The director successfully dissects every layer of a happily married home and how it treats it elders and at the same time also highlights how elders due to age or senility, boost hostility unknowingly – with emphasis on “unknowingly” or subconsciously. These day to day conflicts, however trivial it may seem, drive wedges between relationships.

It is to the director’s credit, that he is able to convey a social message, in the garb of a taut thriller. #AaplaManus #AjayDevgnProductions

#SumitRaghavan as the son Rahul and #IravatiHarse as Bhakti, the daughter-in-law are excellent too.

Definitely watchable – but Satish’s “Ti Sadhya Kai Karte” still remains my favourite! 😉

Hope to see more from this director.

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Sledging in Cricket..

Reposting a old blog/fwd.

Got a forward…nice one regarding sledging.

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Sledging has always been a part of cricket. Even the great WG Grace did it.
Once in an exhibition match given out leg-before, he refused to walk and told the umpire: “They came to watch me bat, not you bowl”. And the innings continued.

Grace’s ability to stand his ground would have done Sunil Gavaskar proud. Once, when the ball knocked off a bail, he replaced it and told the umpire: “Twas the wind which took thy bail orf, good sir.”
The umpire replied: “Indeed, doctor, and let us hope thy wind helps the good doctor on thy journey back to the pavilion.”

The best WG Grace sledge was on him, though, not from him. Charles Kortright had dismissed him four or five times in a county game – only for the umpires to keep turning down his appeals. Finally, he uprooted two of Grace’s three stumps. Grace stalled, as though waiting for a no-ball call or something, before reluctantly walking off with Kortright’s words in his ears: “Surely you’re not going, doctor? There’s still one stump standing.”

The Prasad Vs Sohail Incident: Hero to Zero in 3 easy steps

Chasing India’s score of 287-8, pakistan got off to a flyer of a start, Amir Sohail and Saeed Anwar went about tearing the Indian bowling attack. Pakistan looked all set to win as they reached 110 odd for the loss of just 1 wicket within the 15 overs.

1. Play a Great Shot: Amir Sohail was completely bent on demolishing the Indian bowling to pieces, charging down the track to the faster bowlers (if u can call Prasad that) in this particular case he came down the ground (a good 4-5 steps, anymore and he would have hit Prasad too) and slashed the bowl over vacant off side area… the ball disappeared into the fence in a flash …. what followed has since been etched in the memories of every cricket fan in the subcontinent.

2. Act Oversmart:Amir Sohail is no Miandad. But he tries to be,and fails miserably. Sohail after hitting the shot pointed his bat the area where the bowl had disappeared and then towards Prasad apparently gesturing where he will send the next one.
Its not everyday that you see a batsman sledging the bowler, and Sohail was about to learn just why.

3. Get what you called for: Sohail attempting to repeat the shot (albeit with his feet stuck to the ground this time) made room and exposed his stumps, and his weakness, and in return lost his wicket and his face.
As the wicket lay uprooted, Prasad returned the favour to Sohail, pointing to the pavilion this time.

The comeback was truly remarkable, almost a miracle …. Prasad has bowled thousands of deliveries and taken hundereds of wickets in his career but, it was this one granted him a place in the History of Indian Cricket .. for ever… the ghost of Miandad’s last ball six was exorcised, once and for all.

Steve Waugh Vs Curtly Ambrose Episode.

It really does not get any bigger than this, the two legends of cricket came face to face, literally and engrossed in a verbal duel in a test match in Trinidad. All the juicy details were not to be known until Steve Waugh came out with his autobiography.

Ambrose repeatedly stared Waugh down during a searing spell, and Waugh, who sized up the towering Ambrose, said: “What the f*ck are you looking at? ”
Ambrose was stunned because, as Waugh says (in his Autobiography), “no one had ever been stupid enough” to speak to him like that.
Ambrose replied, “Don’t cuss me, man”, before Waugh’s response, which had nothing to do with bowling.
“Unfortunately, nothing inventive or witty came to mind, rather another piece of personal abuse: ‘Why don’t you go and get f*cked.’ ”
The Windies skipper Richie Richardson had a hard time keeping Ambrose from hurting the Aussie.

McGrath Vs Brandes 

In a showdown of best pacers of two countries, Brandes made up for his complete absence of batting skills by some displaying some great sense of humor and presence of mind.
Aussie paceman Glenn McGrath was bowling to Zimbabwe number 11 Eddo Brandes – who was unable to get his bat anywhere near the ball. McGrath, frustrated that Brandes was still at the crease, wandered up during one particular over and inquired: “Why are you so fat?”
Quick as a flash, Brandes replied: “Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit.”
Even the Aussie slip fielders were in hysterics.

Viv Richards v Greg Thomas

This incident took place during a county championship match between Glamorgan and Somerset. Glamorgan quickie Greg Thomas had beaten Viv Richards’ bat a couple of times and informed the legendary West Indian ace: “It’s red, round and weighs about five ounces, in case you were wondering.”

The very next ball was given the King Viv treament and smashed out of the ground, into a river – at which point Richards piped up: “Greg, you know what it looks like. Now go and find it.”

Merv Hughes and Viv Richards

Merv Hughes usually never short of a word while on the field, rarely keeps quite. During a test match in the West Indies Hughes didn’t say a word to Viv, but continued to stare at him after deliveries. “This is my island, my culture. Don’t you be staring at me. In my culture we just bowl.” Merv didn’t reply, but after he dismissed him he announced to the batsman: “In my culture we just say f*ck off.”

Sachin Tendulkar Vs Abdul Qadir

The year was 1989, the little master had recently made his debut in Pakistan. Sachin not even old enough to get a driving licence Sachin Tendulkar was facing the best bowlers in the business. As the Pakistani crows jeered and mocked Sachin holding out the placards saying “”Dudh Pita Bhachcha ..ghar jaake dhoodh pee”, (hey kid, go home and drink milk), Sachin sent the then young leg spinner Mustaq Ahmed hiding for cover (he had hit two sixes in one over. The frustaded mentor of Mustaq Ahmed the legendary Abdul Qadir challenges Sachin saying “Bachchon ko kyon mar rahe ho? Hamein bhi maar dikhao` (`Why are you hitting kids? Try and hit me.`).
Sachin was silent, since then we all have come to know that he lets his bat do the talking. Abdul Quadir had made a simple request and Sachin obliged, and how. Sachin hit 4 sixes in the over, making the spinner look the kid in the contest. The over read 6, 0, 4, 6 6 6, David had felled Goliath … and a legend was born.

Ian Healy Vs RANatunga

Ian Healy’s made a legendary comment which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney… “You don’t get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat c*nt!”

McGrath to Ramnaresh Sarwan

Sarwan, the West Indies vice-captain, and McGrath went toe-to-toe in an ugly shouting match in Antigua in May 2003, The incident was sparked after Sarwan, on his way to a match-winning second-innings century, reportedly reacted to lurid taunts from McGrath by telling him he should get the answers from his wife, who was recovering from radiation therapy for secondary cancer.

The details:
McGrath: “So what does Brian Lara’s d*ck taste like?”
Sarwan: “I don’t know. Ask your wife.”
McGrath (losing it): “If you ever F*&king mention my wife again, I’ll F*cking rip your F*fing throat out.”

Mark Waugh Vs Adam Parore

Mark Waugh was standing at second slip, Adam Parore relatively new to cricket came to the crease played & missed the first ball.
Mark Waugh- “Ohh, I remember you from a couple years ago in Australia. You were sh*t then, you’re fu*king useless now”.
Parore- (Turning around) “Yeah, that’s me & when I was there you were going out with that old, ugly sl*t & now I hear you’ve married her. You dumb c*nt”. “

Ravi shastri v/s Mike Whitney

Its common knowledge that Indian’s usually don’t resort to sledging, and the Aussies swear by it. In this rare ocassion the tables had turned and it was the Aussies who were at the receiving end.
Shastri hits the ball towards Mike Whitney (the 12th man in the game) and looks for a single, this guy gets the ball in and says
Whitney: “If you leave the crease i’ll break your f***ing head”
Shastri didn’t bat an eyelid before replying : “If you could bat as well as you can talk you wouldn’t be the f***ing 12th man”

Merv Hughes Vs Cronje

Merv Hughes was one of the greatest exponents of the fine “art” of sledging. Once during a tour game in South Africa Hughes was bowling to Hansie Cronje . It was an especially flat wicket and Cronje was hitting Hughes for fours and sixes all over the place.
After the umpteenth boundary, Hughes headed down the pitch, stood near Cronje, let out a fart and said: “Try hitting that for six.” It was five minutes before the guffawing stopped and play could resume.

Robin Smith and Merv Hughes

During 1989 Lords Test, Merv Hughes said to Robin Smith after he played and missed: “You can’t f*cking bat”.
Simth replied, both with the bat and with words, he smashed Hughes to the boundry and said “Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t f*cking bat and you can’t f*cking bowl.”

Team mates Sledging

England were playing Pakistan and, at what turned out to be a crucial moment later on, Frank Tyson managed to get an outside edge off a Pakistani batsman after the batsman had been frustrating them on a hot sweaty day. The ball went right through the hands of Raman Subba Rao who was standing in first slip and through his legs. After the over Raman heads over to the bowler and says, “Sorry Frank, I should’ve closed my legs.” Frank Tyson, who didn’t find any of this amusing, quipped back, “No, you bastard, your mother should have.”

Ian Healy Vs a Short chubby batsman

In one of the tour matches in South Africa, Australia played Hansie Cronje’s province. Cronje was at the non strikers end, there was a short chubby batsman on strike.
Ian Healy yelled to Warne, “Bowl a Mars Bar half way down…We’ll get him stumped”
The Aussies and Cronje were all in hysterics, all this was before a classic reply from the batsman.
The exact words: “Nah, Boonie (David Boon) fielding at short leg will be onto it before I can move.”

Miandad Vs Lillee

Miandad played Lillee to square leg and completed an easy run, with a collision taking place in the center. According to Miandad, Lillee had tried to block him in the path. After a verbal exchange, Lillee went ahead and kicked Miandad on his pads. Miandad, started charging towards Lillee with his bat lifted high above the head, as if to hit him. The umpire’s intervention prevented what could have turned out to be a real assault had Miandad gone head with his plans. However, the picture of Miandad hurling his bat at Lillee made the whole incident look even worse, and was promptly declared as the most indignified incident in the history of Cricket.
Lillee’s version, to this day, had Miandad first hitting him with the bat, and then swearing at him. He maintained that there was no contact from his side throughout the incident.

Note: The author is awsare if the fact that this incident has nothing to do with sledging, but found the temptation of mentioning the episode was too hard to resist.

The Frog Jumping incident, 1992 India Vs Pakistan

India vs Pakistan matches are always a treat to watch, and if its the World Cup its stakes are even greater. Javed Miandad, the Bad boy of cricket, at the receiving end for once. Miffed by the verbals from Kiran More, he complains “Insaan khel rahe hain janwaar nahin” (Human beings are playing not animals). And after a sharp run out chance, where Miandad closely survives Miandad starts jumping up and down, face distorted imitating Kiran More’s appealing. A sight to behold. Pure comedy. Pakistan loses the match but go on to win the cup.
‘I did it instinctively’, Miandad later told. He added, ‘Hey, is this the way you appeal for everything? Don’t appeal like that’.

Dropped the Cup?

Perhaps the most famous sledge in a World Cup match took place the epic Super Six clash between Australia and South Africa (in 2003). South Africa looked on course to a routine victory with Australian captain Steve Waugh at the crease and on 56. At that stage, Waugh clipped the ball in the air straight to South African fielder Herschelle Gibbs. In his haste, Gibbs dropped the ball when attempting to throw it in the air in celebration as he had not fully controlled it. As he passed him, Waugh is said to have asked Gibbs: “How does it feel to have dropped the World Cup?”. Waugh carried on to make an unbeaten 120 and Australia posted an unlikely win and won the World Cup a few days later.
Waugh has however denied that quote, instead claiming that he said “looks like you’ve dropped the match”.

Hughes Vs Miandad

The inimitable Merv Hughes has forgotten more about sledging than most people will ever know, so he was more than a little miffed to be on the receiving end in the 1991 Adelaide Test against Pakistan. Hughes and Javed Miandad almost came to blows after the Pakistani batsman dared to call big Merv a “fat bus conductor”. But revenge was sweet for Hughes. A few balls later he finally got his man and as Miandad walked past, he could not resist shouting “Tickets, please!”

Dennis Lillee Vs Sunil Gavaskar

Dennis Lillee and Sunil Gavaskar, were involved in a war of words in the 3rd Test, MCG, February 1981. A historic win for India in that Test would definitely not have taken place had Sunil Gavaskar not calmed down. He clashed with Australian fast bowler Dennis Lillee, who Gavaskar claims abused him after claiming his wicket and the Indian captain asked non-striker Chetan Chauhan to walk off the field, forfeiting the match. Gavaskar was batting on 70 when Lillee appealed for a leg before decision. Gavaskar showed his bat to the umpire, indicating he had ‘nicked’ the ball before it hit his pads. Angry words were exchanged between the batsman and the bowler, and Lillee even went to the extent of pointing to the batsman the spot where the ball had his pads. The decision went in favour of the bowler and as Gavaskar started his long, dejected walk back to the pavilion, Lillee turned around and abused him. That was it. Gavaskar snapped, and decided to forfeit the match.
Later, Gavaskar was to write in his book ‘Idols’: “That (the walkout) was the most regrettable incidents of my life. Whatever may be the provocation and whatever the reason, there was no justification for my action and I realize now that I did not behave the way a captain and sportsman should.”

Flintoff Vs Tino Best

Best, never short of a word or two when he is bowling, was done up like a kipper by the England all-rounder as West Indies slumped to defeat in the first Test. Flintoff saw his opponent preparing to face Giles’ off-spin and shouted: “Watch the windows, Tino!” The wind-up had the desired effect, causing Best to come charging out of his crease like a man possessed. He took a wild swing at the ball, missed and was promptly stumped by Geraint Jones. Not a broken window in sight. Flintoff could not contain himself and spent the next five minutes giggling like a teenager, as Best sat on the balcony rueing his stupidity.

Viv Richards to Gavaskar

Gavaskar had decided to relinquish his opening position and come in at no 4 for that test. But, Malcolm Marshall fired out Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0/2.And he thought there would be less pressure! Viv Richards says “Man, it don’t matter where you come in to bat, the score is still zero.”

Steve Waugh and Parthiv Patel 

Amidst all the hype surrounding his farewell match, Steve Waugh had to contend with an unexpected dose of his own medicine from a player half his age.
As Waugh fought a grim battle to stave off defeat in the series-deciding fourth Test in Sydney, 19 year-old Indian wicket-keeper Parthiv Patel tried to unsettle the veteran batsman through some banter.
The baby-faced Patel egged on the 38 year-old stalwart to play one of his sweep shots one last time.
The India ‘keeper was saying, ‘Come on, just one more of the famous slog-sweeps before you finish’
Waugh replied: ‘Look, show a bit of respect. You were in nappies when I debuted 18 years ago’.

Rod Marsh and Ian Botham

When Botham took guard in a Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal words: “So how’s your wife and my kids?”

Trueman and Aussie batsman

In an England v Australia Test during early 1960’s Trueman was fielding close to the gate from the pavilion. As a new batsman came out he turned to shut the gate,
Trueman said “Don’t bother son, you won’t be out there long enough.”

Daryll Cullinan and Shane Warne

As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had been waiting 2 years for another chance to humiliate him. “Looks like you spent it eating,” Cullinan retorted.

Adam Parore and Daryll Cullinan

Because Cullinan is well known for being Warne’s bunny, New Zealand keeper Parore greeted the South African, carefully playing the first ball from kiwi Chris Harris, with a cry of: “Bowled Warnie!”

Malcolm Marshall and David Boon

Malcolm Marshall was bowling to David Boon who had played and missed a couple of times. Marshall: “Now David, Are you going to get out now or am I going to have to bowl around the wicket and kill you?”

James Ormond and Mark Waugh

James Ormond had just come out to bat on an ashes tour and was greeted by MarkWaugh……..
Mark : “F*ck me, look who it is. Mate, what are you doing out here, there’s no way you’re good enough to play for England”
James: “Maybe not, but at least i’m the best player in my family”

Waugh Vs Jamie Siddons

In a Sheffield Shield game between NSW and SA, a Waugh twin (not sure which) was taking an enternity to take guard, asking the umpire for centre, middle and leg, two legs – the whole lot. Then he steps away towards leg side and has another look around the field, before re checking centre.
Jamie Siddons is at slip, and decided enough is enough. He yells out.”For christ sake, it’s not a ‘f*cken test match.”
Waugh replies: “Of course it isn’t … You’re here.”

Mother (in law) of all sledges

In the 1980’s Ian Botham returned early from a tour of Pakistan, and on radio joked “Pakistan is the sort of country to send your mother in-law to.” Needless to say the Pakistanis did not find this amusing, and when Pakistan defeated England in the 1992 World Cup Final, Aamer Sohail told Ian Botham “Why don’t you send your mother-in-law out to play, she cannot do much worse.”

Barmy Army Vs Shane Warne

England’s “Barmy Army” recently decided to sledge leg spinner Shane Warne musically, and it has been described as boorishly personal, but effective.
The sledge was based on Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep – the “Where’s your poppa gone?” Song. It has been converted to “Where’s your missus gone?” (Warne had recently been divorced in life)

Special Mention

Inzamam-ul-Haq once told Brett Lee to “stop bowling off spinners”.

In the recent Karachi Test when Irfan Pathan came to bat in 2nd Innings Afridi shouted two times ” O mera Shehzada aaya ! ” (Oh! my prince has come)

 

THOR – RAGNAROK! – A review.

What a dose of cheerful medicine this movie has been for me ! A total rollercoaster fun ride.

This is perhaps the most true to the comic book movie from Marvel I have seen. #Thor:Ragnarok is not only a visual delight, but also the comedy is spot on. And thank god HULK is back but somehow #MarkRuffalo does not click as #BruceBanner. As Hulk though, he is on a rampage and you get to see the Hulk’s humane side too.

Chris Helmsworth without the trademark hair, still looks Thor and is having a rollicking time in the role. He shares good chemistry with Tom Hiddleston. But it is #CateBlanchett who kills it as his evil sister Hela. She looks and lives the part. Jeff Goldblum disappoints – could’ve been a more solid actor for a tough villain.

The sound track is amazing and I need to get my hands on the OST. CGI department wins it hands down as the most appealing vfx ever seen in such comic book series [though DR Strange was good too and he makes an appearance here].

I just couldn’t believe that this movie is directed by the same director of “Hunt for the Wilderpeople” – Taika Waititi. Wow, what a range!

You will see lot of famous faces throughout the movie like Hopkins, Matt Damon and Sam Neill among others but it is the comic book soul of the movie that stays with you and for vintage comic book lovers like me it’s a nostalgic trip!

Enjoy – I will be catching a second solo viewing!

thor ragnarok

Black Dussehra!

Hi Friends

Happy Dussehra!!

However you must have observed it is going to be a black Dussehra for some families in Mumbai.

Apart from receiving forwards on WhatsApp about the tragedy, today morning onwards I received a barrage of forwards of how the current Modi government is better than the years of corrupted rule by the Congress. The political call centres are in full force !

All such forwards ended with nauseous questions of our patriotism or nationalism for questioning the administration in charge.

While I too voted wholeheartedly for Modi, I definitely did not surrender my rights to question the authorities, it is every citizen’s birthright.

What is more disturbing, is that there is a very visible divide among friends and families – who have set aside their logical reasoning and indulge in forwarding hateful or demeaning political messages.

How many of you walk the overbridge daily on your commute to work ? Why only Mumbai – I had been to Ahmedabad 2-3 years back and came back impressed with is civic infrastructure and recently when I visited Ahmedabad, it was like a war ravaged city, which I recently was informed done up overnight at the expense of 1200 Crores on account of visit by the Japanese PM – who does not have to travel daily in Mumbai or Ahmedabad !

A young life, who just six months ago became a chartered accountant, lost her life in this tragedy before she could form her wings – look at your child and give a thought to such dividing messages.

I already know the solution that will be offered to the victims –
1. Ex-gratia payment
2. Promise of an inquiry

At the cost of 3000+ crores we will be erecting a Shivaji memorial in the middle of the ocean or the worlds largest statue / tribute to Sardar Patel. They are considered as the greatest heroes in Indian history, do you think they would have been happy to see the current state of infrastructure ??

Remember it could have been your family member to on one of the many bridges in Mumbai !

* No I do not have a call centre appointing official trolls to type this post.

The PROMISE – 2016

promise_xlg

Though being a history buff, I had no clue of the Armenian genocide by the Ottoman Turkish Empire. But this movie compelled me to read some material on the same, and perhaps will do so for sometime.

Terry George, director of Hotel Rwanda, has delivered a fantastic semi-fictional tale of Love, Friendship, Patriotism woven around the Armenian Genocide by the turks, which they continue to deny till date.

This is a period movie set in the 1915, when the sun was setting on the Ottoman Empire. The detailing of the period is bound to leave you speechless. The Cinematography is first rate.

Oscar Isaac outdoes all the brilliant actors in the movie as Mikael Boghosian, a medical student who aspires to study and serve his village but for which he has no money. He agrees to his father’s idea of getting engaged to a girl from his village and for which he will get dowry of 400 gold coins that will support his travel to Constantinopole, present day Istanbul, to study medicine. He promises his wife to be, that he will be back soon.

Mikael’s Uncle in Constantinopole, supports him. His Turkish friend Emre Ogan, son a Turkish General and a rich man, looks up to him as a mentor and classmate in medicine school and always helps him out. Christian Bale, as Chris the american journalist is in the city too, meticulously reporting on the political movements of the turkish empire. His girlfriend, Ana, is the dance teacher to the kids of Mikael’s uncle. And thereby begins a story of a love triangle, familial duties, unrequited love, friendship and loyalty irrespective of religion or nation.

Each and every supporting actor is brilliant, but it is Mikael and Ana’s love story and more than the same, the Armenian Genocide which will haunt you and the so called Superpowers of the world who turned a blind eye towards the same.

Don’t miss it at any cost !

Tubelight – A cinegoer’s review

Do not understand why Tubelight is being panned by one and sundry… In fact I dreaded that hope it’s not another Bodyguard, Ready kinda film, where Salman the star takes over each and every department.. and surprisingly it was different, at least Salman made an effort.

It’s definitely painful to watch him put such ernest efforts to act, but with due credit to the director, Salman pulled it off well. It is of course and out and out Salman show, though Zeeshan Ayyub irritates even though he is a fine actor. It is an official adaptation of LITTLE BOY, so it’s not as if it’s lifted and copied.

I have seen Little Boy, Jakob Salvati the boy is made of different mettle, but this is not about Little Boy but about our Sultan. And I feel he is in fine form.

Yes, Sultan was notches above this one, and so was the silly, funny Dabbang. Salman “acted” in Sultan too, and was awesome else his larger than life characters like Chulbul were getting on the nerves.

For his fans, who expect “Dhisoom” “Dhisoom” male machoism, they will be disappointed, but it’s not a bad fare, watchable once. However Kabir Khan could have done better and he is capable of the same.

Tubelight_Poster

Hacksaw Ridge – Review

Imagine that a person volunteers to join army during war to serve his nation and at the same time also has vowed that he would never pick up a gun to kill someone but serve only as a medic to help fellow soldiers.

Such stories of real heroic valor usually die as unsung heroes but it takes the caliber of a Clint Eastwood or in this case Mel Gibson to direct and bring to screen the story of Desmond Doss, who single handedly, without picking up a gun saved 75 lives at Hacksaw Ridge.

Mel Gibson may have had a tough time fighting his internal demons, but there is no denying the brilliance of this man, whether it was Passion of the Christ or the Apocalypto. Like Shyamalan who excels at horror/thriller genre, Mel shoots war scenes like no one does.

Andrew Garfield, the spidey, is Desmond Doss here, a simpleton who knows his priorities and decides to stick to them – even if means narrowly escaping a court martial. The horror of world war 2, the sacrifices of such soldiers along with an underdog’s incredible story of bravery will overwhelm you.

Yes, Mel Gibson is back and thank god for that.

#HacksawRidge #MelGibson #AndrewGarfield #Oscars2017

Hacksaw Ridge Movie